This group is for Christian Young Adults and Singles (20s-30s) who are interested in fun activities (game nights, bowling, movies, roller skating, six flags, etc.) We will also try to do one volunteer. 10 Dating Tips for Christian Singles By Dr. Linda Mintle Family Therapist. CBN.com – You are dating an incredibly good-looking guy. You both feel the attraction building up. Now is not the time to decide! It’s too difficult to think when passion overtakes you. You must decide before you go on the date what your limits will be. Young's best 100% FREE Christian dating site. Meet thousands of Christian singles in Young with Mingle2's free Christian personal ads and chat rooms. Our network of Christian men and women in Young is the perfect place to make Christian friends or find a Christian boyfriend or girlfriend in Young. Join the hundreds of single Arizona Christians already online finding love and friendship with.

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• Christian Dating For Young Adults

I keep seeing something in the outer circles of my circles. When you help run summer camps, one of the blessings is getting go to be around college age people.

I love seeing young adults finding their strengths and growing in maturity. It’s a delight to be able to invest in them. A strange thing I’ve noticed is that they get younger and younger looking every year. Weird.

Ok, kidding aside… I have noticed something concerning regarding Christians and sex. It breaks my heart, confuses me, and even angers me all at the same time.

I remember being a young Christian and sorting out behaviors. I also remember truly not understanding some things, Biblically. I even remember hearing some people teach anti-Biblical things and being confused.

So… let me be clear about something:

Christians should not have sex outside of marriage. Yup, seriously. No, I’m not kidding. And no, that idea is not just for Biblical times. It’s for today.

We may think this is just for dating teens, but it’s not. I am actually more concerned about the young adults who are deceived into thinking their sexual activity isn’t a big deal.

I know that our culture is immersed in sex. I know that dating without sex is difficult. I know that just about everybody is doing it.

None of those excuse sex before marriage.

Not even if two people are in love.

Not even if two people are grown adults.

Not even if two people are marrying each other soon.

Sex is for marriage. Period.

It is counter cultural, I know that. Living a life for Christ is counter-cultural.

I have a dear friend who is in her thirties and unmarried. She has never had sex. Why? Because she is a Christian. She loves the LORD and so she honors His ways.

She went to the doctor once and the nurse practitioner didn’t believe her when she said she had never had sex and was not sexually active, that she was saving herself for marriage. The nurse was shocked.

She practically insisted my friend take the birth control offered. She just about said aloud that my friend was lying. Even when told that her faith called her to abstinence, the nurse refused to believe.

I’ve seen the shock too. As you know, I did not save sex for marriage. Once I gave my life to the LORD, it didn’t take too long for me to understand that sex was no longer an activity on the approved list. I became what was called a secondary virgin.

Paul and I didn’t have sex together before we married (though we were not honoring, which is another topic and post).

Fast forward to us being engaged: After I bought my wedding dress, I would go to the bridal shop every few days. I’d put on my beloved dress and sashay around in it. True story.

During one sashay visit, somehow the fact came out that Paul and I were going to enjoy a true wedding night (first time sex together, though maybe a true wedding night would best describe two virgins). I remember jaws dropping. None of the women, young and old, could believe that we had dated for almost three years and hadn’t had sex.

That’s when I experienced seeing shock the first time. At least it was at a secular store. When I saw it in church, I was a bit perturbed.

I started visiting churches right after becoming a Christian. As was a junior in college, so I went to the young adults class. One day, they were discussing premarital sex.

Actually, it was like they were deciding what the answer was. Those fifteen people were making the call. And they decided that the instructions for sex only inside a marital covenant didn’t apply to the 1990s. When I raised my hand and asked, “Have you all just decided that the Bible is outdated?” Shocked faces, but silence.

I know that some young women really do believe this lie, since they might even be hearing it at church!

There are many passages that address the truth that sex outside of covenant is sexual immorality.

Acts 15:20;1 Corinthians 5:1;6:13,18;10:8;2 Corinthians 12:21;Galatians 5:19;Ephesians 5:3;Colossians 3:5;1 Thessalonians 4:3;Jude

I find it interesting that several of these passages call the Christian to be unlike the pagans. We are called to be different, for Him.

As a Christian, we should view sex the way God views it.

It is natural for us to want to rationalize or justify our behavior, even our sin. We do it all the time, sadly. I know that we are not perfect. We are made perfect in Christ. What a delight grace it!

Romans 6:1-2 addresses this grace and call to holiness.

“What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase? May it never be! How shall we who died to sin still live in it?”

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I pray that if you are sinning in this area, that you talk to The God of Grace. Ask for forgiveness. Walk in repentance. Seek the grace to stand firm in honoring God with your body in this area.

Be set apart, Christians!

Lately I have been getting a lot of questions from older Christian singles who want to be married. They have been asking about what dating advice there is for them and what changes should they make to their dating approach since they are getting a little bit older.

Here are 4 Christian dating tips for older adults who would like to be married.

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1. Trying Something New

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My general tip would be to just try something different. Lots of times Christians hear a sermon or a teaching on dating and then assume that advice is the only way to ever date. There are certainly biblical truths that apply to dating that Christians should never violate, but “how” people date is an area where we have lots of freedom.

God has not given us one dating path to follow. The way people are joined together in marriage has changed over the centuries. Marriage is where God has let us know a lot more details. So you should not be overly attached to just one dating model. You don’t have to get to know someone as friends first before dating them, you are allowed to date your best friend, you don’t always have to be in a group setting, you can be in a group setting, you can date someone you just met, you can online date, you can go on a blind date from a trusted friend – as long as you are not violating a command in Scripture and you are not sinning.

Overall, if what you have been doing is not working, it’s time to try something different. Don’t just keep trying the same thing (or not trying the same thing) and expect different results.

2. Take Advantage of the Opportunities You Do Get

I think one change in advice that I would give to Christians who feel they are getting a bit older is to take advantage of the opportunities that do come across your path.

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If a Christian guy or girl comes along that you are interested in or attracted to, you shouldn’t just sit back and see what happens like you did when you were 20. As you know, the older you get the less options there are. Don’t miss an opportunity to get to know someone who seems to have potential. If you are a woman, this can be a bit challenging because you might believe there is nothing you can do but sit back and wait to be pursued. (Read: Should a Christian Girl Pursue a Guy?)

I disagree. There are a lot of options you have, but perhaps the best piece of practical advice I have is use the power of an invite. If you want to let a guy know you are interested without coming across as desperate, just send him an invitation to do something. In person, over the phone, through text, whatever, just ask him if he would be interested in going out to dinner, a movie, or some other event you would enjoy. Invite and then let him take it from there.

All in all, whether you are a Christian guy or girl who is getting older, you have to accept that the options are more limited, therefore you should not let good opportunities pass you up. You can’t use the same approach you used when you were 19 or 20. You had more time and more options then. If you are going to error on the side of coming across as too forward or too passive, the older you get the more you want to take chances socially and just see what might happen rather than just waiting around for the other person to do something.

3. Date Outside of Your Social Box

This piece of advice applies to anyone who is having trouble meeting other Christians who they would want to date. If you are not meeting anyone in your circle, one solution is to start looking outside of your social box.

We all have a social box. We all come from a certain culture, from a certain neighborhood, from a certain economic environment, and from a certain family background. There’s nothing wrong with marrying someone like you, but you might be limiting some great options if you never start dating outside of your box.

Visit a church with a different culture. Start looking to date someone like you’ve never dated before. For example, have you ever considered dating someone who already has kids? This is a radical idea for some, but the older you get the more unrealistic it becomes that you will find someone who has been totally single there whole life. There are a lot of beautiful Christian single moms and strong Christian single dads out there that have grown from their past life experiences and are now ready to be a great spouse.

So think outside the box. What “type” of people have you always dated? Try something new. You never know what could happen.

4. Examine Your Expectations and Requirements of People You Will Date

Lastly, one huge problem that often causes prolonged singleness is perfectionism. In general, perfectionism kills productivity. When you apply this principle to Christian dating, sometimes the reason people remain single for so long is because they have too many requirements and boxes they need to check before they will ever give a guy or a girl a chance.

I’m not saying you compromise on you values or violate God’s word. But perhaps you need to shorten your list of requirements. The one piece of dating advice that I always hear and which I really do not like is “Never settle.” Of course I agree in general. You should never marry someone you don’t actually love. But I think some people say “Never settle” and Christian singles hear “Never date someone who isn’t exactly what you dreamed about.”

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Our thoughts, dreams, and expectations as young people rarely match reality. When we get older, we can either cling to our fantasies and get bitter or depressed that our hopes are never fulfilled; or we can adjust our expectations and learn to appreciate people for who they are rather than pick them apart for who they are not. Many times people say, “There’s just no good options out there.” That might be true, or it might also be true that you just can’t see the good options because your standards are too high and you can’t see over them. There are oftentimes good options out there, but there are never perfect options out there.

So I’m not saying you need to lower your standards if you are getting older and are still single. I’m just saying it’s something to think about and pray about. What qualities are you placing too much importance on? What qualities might you want in a guy or girl but are not absolute necessities? The more expectations you have the less likely you will ever meet someone just like that.

Don’t just date anyone. If you don’t like someone, you don’t like him or her. That’s fine. Just be open to God doing something creative in your relationships.